I
think I better take it upon my self to enlighten some of the masses
out there, because no one else will. Men and women are different
(Duh yotamaster), now don't start raving yet. Where I'm headed
is that either isn't that hard to understand.
Men,
this ones easy because I am one. Men are very competitive, cocky,
always horny as hell, and forever in the pursuit of something
faster, bigger, or more powerful. All you women out there don't
understand what the pressures of being a man are. Look at that
incident in traffic, the one where the man wants to kick the shit
out of the guy in the next car for cutting him off. This isn't
stupid, it is bread into us from birth to prove that you are the
dominate male, and beating some idiots ass in traffic does just
that (P.S. guys if this is attempted and someone twice as big
gets out of the car in front of you, just hope you have a little
more power under the hood than he does; and run like hell, just
a hint.) You see women will never understand guys because they
don't feel the urge to destroy like guys do, I mean come on, wouldn't
a job smashing cars be so cool? Men like to get dirty (unless
your a prissy boy), while women don't. Guys like contact sports,
most women like the discovery channel. Men love to resort to physical
violence, while women will just resort to vicious gossip, and
the worse thing about that is that their friends help them; guys
are on their own (unless outnumbered). A guys buds are his friends
for life, inseparable, a do anything for each other relationship
that adds to the testosterone fire. AHHH yes nothing like your
best bud, a case of beer, a couple of hundred fireworks, a nice
Saturday afternoon, and a brand new carburetor to put on the truck.
Women here is a hint, this is man world, this is where we go to
be rude, crude, and inhuman to small things; so when you step
into this don't be shocked and dismayed. If your married than
this world is visited few and far between, because usually our
balls are tucked neatly into your purse till you decide you can
take them out and let us have them beck for a little while to
go out and play.
Women,
now this is a lot tufer, not just because I'm not one, but because
you guys are a little screwed up. A woman lives on a diet of estrogen
ups and downs, buying outrageously overpriced makeup (a guy would
never spend $20 on a lipstick), and the devoured souls of mens
egos. The trick out there is to realize that women understand
they can get a guy to do anything they want. Why? DUH, they have
all the pussy, and most of the brains. You see it was the mans
ego and testosterone that put us on top, and I have a feeling
(if your married than you have already accepted this fact) that
women rule this world, and everything we think as men, they let
us. Lets face it men, how else do you explain the fact that a
girl can always drink for free.
I still to this day believe that at about age 2 or 3 women are
given a book, a hand guide so to speak, on how to do the shit
they do. Come on no one can just come up with this stuff. Its
like if life was a book report, the women read the book and used
cliffs notes, while the men head butted each other then pound
a beer.
The thing that throws off all of my theories up till now, are
those women liberals that want mens jobs. Ohh that's right, no
worries, they usually wind up holding the stop and slow sign.
Shit, that was the job we used as a break while diggin that stupid
ditch, see they did it to us again.
Will
we ever figure each other out each other? I hope not, that's what
keeps it fun, is trying to figure out just how much the other
knows. Just know this all you women out there, I WILL FIND THAT
DAM BOOK before I die, and I'm going to copy it and send it out,
right here on Yotamaster.com. So I guess you all better keep checking
back in to make sure I haven't found it yet; and don't be sendin
none of those big Amazon bitches here to take care of me so I
won't let you're secret out, I'm a really big guy and I'm armed
to the teeth.
In
all reality, I like the way things worked out between the sexes.
I do have to admit that the men got the better deal, as far as
pay and social workings go, but what the hell, god gave all you
women pussys and I think that's a pretty dam good trade, if you
ask me. Let me just leave you with this; women go around all day
looking at other women and critiquing them, while also looking
at men and doing the same. I think if a woman were changed to
a man the only thing that would change would be that they were
the sticker instead of the stickie. If men had to do the switch,
I don't think I will get any arguments here, WE'D ALL BE LESBIANS.